Regional Lampoon Band Profiles: The White Stripes

Here's a band profile of (drum roll, please) ... The White Stripes!

No longer a band, The Whites Stripes were a band.

They consisted of Jack White and Meg White.

Meg White, the drummer, never had a lesson. Ever.

And Jack White played different instruments at different times. And he had a goatee.

One time, they played a concert (who would've thought that a band would play their music in front of other people?), and they only played one note.

That's it.

Regional Lampoon Band Profiles: The Beatles

Regional Lampoon's first band profile is The Beatles, the band that started it all! I, um, forget what it is, but nevertheless they started it!

Consisting of Paul Simon, George...uh...Harris, Rango, and that guy with the long hair, The Beatles is a band that everyone knows about, excluding small children and babies.

Each of the band members went on to solo careers, some successful, and some not.

George Harris went onto bigger and more popular things than The Beatles, playing the coveted role of Captain Simon Katanga in Raiders of the Lost Ark, and Kingsley Shacklebolt, one of the main characters in the Harry Potter film series.

Rango, the drummer, recently voiced the main character of the film 'Rango', which is about a cowboy lizard named Rango. The film won three Oscars, including Best Documentary Not by Michael Moore and Best Film of All Time.

That guy with long hair made a song about imagination or something, but I think he died a few years ago. Breaking news! He's still dead.

And Paul Simon went on to form the Grateful Dead with his best friend, cartoonist Art Spiegelman. He was a frequent musical guest on Saturday Night Live, a short-lived Howard Cosell show. Wait, maybe it was the more famous one, Saturday Night Live. I don't know.

I've said many things about The Beatles here. So now I'm done.